ABOUT
oh? i can write a novel as my bio?? don't mind if i do.....
first off, i'm not a naturally gifted musician, like most session musicians come off being (or at least they put in the hours practicing to get really good at their instrument, which is something i have yet to do). second, i absolutely hate practicing unless there's a real motive like if it's a collab or a full band sort of thing (obviously practicing in a band is enjoyable).
mostly, on my own time with music, i just fool around with my own jizz jazz jamboree playhouses using my custom setup of an un-updated mac computer from 2014 and roughly drafted cell phone recordings. for album art i use my own pics from my phone or, actually, very often, just random photos that are likely copyrighted i found on google for an awful minimalism thumbnail art experience. i'm so complacent with that- it's unreal.
i have 0 experience as a session musician. the only "band" experience i have is when we were forming our own indie/alternative/post-hardcore bands with my friends from school in our garages and basements. technically, for the experimental hardcore/satanic black metal bands, we played above ground in places like christian youth centre music studios and we used sharpie markers for nail polish because we were too poor to afford our own instruments. besides a rehearsal space, we didn't get (or want) help from anybody because f---- other people's lousy help, right? we made everything and recorded everything ourselves. it wasn't much, but it felt like the entire world at the time. even though i had never taken a drum lesson in my life, i was on drums since drummers are i guess hard to come by.
during this period i, and a bunch of us, were high on misspent youth, slam metal, stolen gear, cheap pizza n wedges, faygo, irregularly-played double kicks, christian youth centres, and idealistic fantasy lifestyles that didn't actually exist except in our own heads,, while immediately the following week roughly re-performing those emotionally charged exercises of wrath at a live show only one time in a blue room before the band would immediately split, and so on, just for sh*****s lol but mostly to let out our emo teenager aggression to other aggressive emo teenagers.
i think, overall, all of my music groups formed and did what we did basically 'cause we were captivated by the music we heard and wanted to replicate some part of that beauty to other (young) people in our community... none of my bands sold any records. that wasn't the point. the point was to do what we wanted because we could. it surely was an accomplishment to say the least.....
in terms of me coming out and jamming with you, i might or might not be down fyi, but if you're looking for someone to come play a specific part that is complicated and technically versatile, well then don't ask me. i play things, very simple things, as i see fit, and sometimes, it won't rub off on you right. that's ok. i surely don't have the technical proficiency that other session musicians duly have anyway. other than some outside-of-school group music classes as a child, i am mostly a self-taught musician. i have no idea how to read tabs, though i know sheet music pretty well from those children's programs.
i have a background with jazz also, due to a few years of taking alto sax lessons from a jazz ensemble bandleader (who was pretty freaking awesome to watch perform live...i saw him once when his Kitchener Ontario band Top Pocket were doing a promo for their recently released album), and i'm very comfortable with free improvisation on anything you put in my hands or mouth so if that is something you are looking for maybe i could pass??? but still even though i know all the notes, i am not very fluent with sax these days as i left it back home....sadness.....
also, i've never played a live set more than 20 times or longer than 20 minutes. out of those few times, i've only played live 1 time as a solo artist. fortunately, that will likely never happen again......
well, these days, we are high in the hip in the grooving 2020s as a human race, and.... uhh...as for myself... i'm artistically much quieter, more inward focused, much less involved in "the community" and not too concerned about outside influence than previous. i'm trying to better myself as a human being by working like normal people do trying to earn my own way in life. i figure i already know how to waste time really well doing art so, let's try wasting time working a job for a change...
if you get the chance to meet me in person, i'm usually super awkward as f*****..... you'll get used to that. i am not an asshole and i am not a hostile person. however, my ideas based around creative outlet might come off that way. you'll have to get used to that. if all that works for you, maybe i am an ok fit for your session... or, dare i say it..... two sessions.....????...but don't expect anything great, i'm more experimental and progressive psychedelic rock with my approach. (last week it took me literally a few hours just to figure out a simple, moderately-slow (andante) three-note progression).
if you're still convinced you wanna form a collab with me, just remind yourself of exactly how long the coolest collaborations in history lasted.........not long......MAYBE a few measly minutes...??? just look at john cale and lou reed lmao
in terms of my ability.... i, sort of, sketchily strum when i play guitar, i can't even put my fingers on the right places a lot of the time. stylistically, maybe i am along the rhymes of silent gangster rap-rock mixed with splooshes of depressing outsider bluegrass dance-punk waltzing made for a soundtrack to a musical nightmare inside the elevator, and very NOT like the traditional "punk" you hear on the top 40s music streaming websites where everybody's paying for access to creative ideas cause that's slavery in the saddest form i feel sorry for real artists trying to make living these days. with these big corporate bullies they are "stringin' the ring" more so now than ever before.......
...i'm not really political at all so don't talk politics with me but here are some of mine......
so yeah, i'm very reclusive now, and very reactionist around local music scenes (picture a 2004 syd barrett deciding it was worthwhile coming out of hiding and forming the 2nd incarnation of astronomy domine just for the sake of getting people's hopes up, where he posted on social media, even booked some studio dates, and then, at the very last minute, deciding it was not worthwhile...... lmfao.)
and, i am irritated by how so many local bands decide to not think anywhere outside their local circle.....
i am also very not-satisfied with modern mainstream consumerism society and culture (you thought the 80s-00s were bad???!) and also no longer that open to collab with just anyone. that being sad, i really love collabing, and, take a lot of passion and energy towards it. i'm just picky. collabs are like friendships. they take effort. and they ain't for everybody. oh yeah and for my already recorded "audio" if you search my bands up you'll probably find them somewhere hidden underneath the back index of a file sharing site listed as "classified" and if not you'll probably spend a great deal of time on "free" sites and you'll still find the 300+ full length albums..... somehow........
it is uncertain when i am likely to be available for anyone else..... althoughh am most expressive in the eearly morning right before sunrise, right when my penis is rock hard.......
- Screen name:
- ryan133417
- Member since:
- Nov 20 2023
- Active over 1 month ago
- Level of commitment:
- Just for Fun
- Years playing music:
- 4
- Gigs played:
- Under 10
- Most available:
- Nights
Influences
why would you want to know my influences? what difference would it make if you knew them? would it change your opinion of me and what i stand for? maybe.....
Instrument experience:
- Saxophone:
- Intermediate
- Vocalist - Baritone:
- Beginner
- Rhythm Guitar:
- Beginner
- Acoustic Guitar:
- Beginner
- Background Singer:
- Beginner
EQUIPMENT
these instruments are currently strictly for my at-home usage, for multiple important reasons, however.....
-a deep red with custom-painted (by my fellow bassist friend) matte blue pickguard p-bass
-a poorly maintained, decal-fashioned 2000s starcaster also with old strings (it was thrung off a stage once and raped a few times during live shows)
-and a fender bass amp i bought off amazon
Also i own a yamaha DTX 402 kit and another real kit but they are at my parents' back in ontario, only the 3-4 drum pads on the Yamaha Dx still even work from my abrasive, unhinged playing.....
